rafi-dangelo:

‘Toddlers & Tiaras’ Alanna…honey boo-boo chile!

Everything about this clip is wrong wrong WRONG.  But.  LOLOLOLOL!!  I just feel like that girl will eventually end up on an episode of Maury You Are Not The Father.  A dolla makes me holla?  Even the interviewers couldn’t keep it together.  And where is the Shaniqua/Vontriece/Ma’Quavious in this little girl’s life?! “Honey boo boo chile” does not just organically grow from white people. I’m just sayin.

Also: Mountain Dew makes mice turn into jelly.  The company said so themselves.  Stop feeding your kids that.  Plus, if you yourself are Shrek-sized, wouldn’t you try to do everything you could to keep your kids from being that way?  Do you know how many calories are in a soda?  I’m brainwashing my kids forreal.  They will think soda is battery acid and will poison them to death, I swear.   “You see these bubbles honey?  THEY WILL BOIL YOUR INSIDES AND YOU WILL DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH.”

Obviously I will be an awesome parent.

I have never watched this show but this clip is just amazing.